Be intentional

What a sweet reunion! I feel no need to explain myself either.


I can barely type one word without my fingers exploding and then having to delete a whole bunch of jibberish. I have feared this very moment for nearly two weeks. If I were to return for any reason would I just purge and scare you all away? Maybe you are all away already and there is nothing more I can do. Nonetheless, to the faithful few - it'll come back to you one day. Really what God showed me among many lessons these last two weeks is that I really do not care who is on the other end of this. This is about Him. Starting like I ended - this is a love story about my love relationship with my Creator and that is it. I am thankful that I was given clarity and tangible signs of God's hand in my little past time - both things I didn't expect at all.

These two weeks were a whole chapter in itself. I am taking a class every Thursday night called Perspectives. This class has been life changing but not merely because of the teaching in itself but because of the timing as well along with other circumstances. For some reason, after 13 years of being a God follower and at times a very radical God-follower, I have literally just recently experienced some 'big picture' truths that I had thought I already knew. But to know something and to experience something are two very different things. I have known and believed for a long time that God loved me and pursued me. I could sing the song about it and I can tell you all about it. Recently, though, through baptism I have re-discovered or rather, discovered for the very first time, what it feels like to be intimately known and whole-heartedly pursued. I was weary of being baptized a few weeks ago. Several reasons but the most stifling of which revolves completely around that ugly thing called pride. I thought that I would need to prove to those that knew me that even though I was just being baptized - I really had believed all of the foundational truths I had preached for the 13 years prior. I was disgusted that I even worried what you thought but I coldn't help it. I guess I was judging myself the way I may have looked at someone else in my position. My whole perspective regarding this sacred step was flip-flopped that Sunday that I approached the beach as the sun was setting amid the faint sound of hymns being sung in the background. What if this really is a new beginning for you, Betsy? There is no reason to fear - I am bigger than anything you can imagine and your faith can be bigger. Your purpose can be bolder. Your zeal can be stronger. Isnt it funny how just when you think you have arrived - you realized you are only at Start. Just when you think you grasp how great and wide the Fathers love is He comes and rocks your face off and you stand speechless at a God that truly is bigger than anything we can conceive. Nonetheless, I felt as though I were walking down the aisle to be married forever to someone who knew me inside and out. How had it taken me so long to realize that baptism was merely a sign of identity??? Was I truly only ready to take this step a few weeks ago? The answer is yes. In an odd way I know with 100% certainty that the timing was divine. God brought my heart to the exact place it needed to be to be able to fully take the next step. WOW!!! I decided on that day to be intentional about my faith. It is not a bebe gun that you just fire and hope that you hit something. God has called us to be intentional with His message.

Not just with the message of good news though but with my time and my money and my energy and my conversations and my interactions with strangers and my ambitions and my goals. As Andy Stanley often says, the opposite of being lost isnt being found - it is just knowing where you are....You gotta know where you are to know how to get to where you wanna go. AMEN!!! Why before was I unable to apply this to my life? Why did I think it wasnt for me???

So whether it is blogging for you or having a conversation with your coworker as you walk to lunch - be intentional. Do everything with purpose and nothing haphazerdly. Jesus did not walk on this earth to see what He might bump into. He walked with purpose and He took each step fulfilling more and more of that purpose. If only we could learn to truly emaulate our Crator???

Keeping in stride, I have recognized overwhelmingly my purpose in sharing any thought with you over the w-w-w. I know that this purpose will be met whether or not I ever know it. "it is fine to be zealous, provided the purpose is good, and to be so always and not just when I am with you." (Galatians 4:18)

Inhaleeee........exhaleeeee........It feels so so good to be back. It feels even better to be back with purpose.