Maturity

Few people have it...most don't. I know we gain it with experience but somehow I came out of the womb a little on the old side. But not even talking about me....my oldest brother, for example, is extremely mature for his age or atleast I think so. I think life has given him lemons at times and he has truly made margaritas out of the rotten ones. This is maturity at it's finest...making the most of every experience and through it all remaining level leaded. Maturity isnt an age thing though - it is how you are wired. I think it comes from our confidence in Christ in us. Seriously. The more confident I am about Christ taking over my body and actions - the more like Him I become....the less like me I become. The less I am concerned about others opinions about me or the outcomes of situations. People call this spiritaul maturity I guess because we can be mature (my mama says mature as in mu-tour so even saying this word makes me laugh)in all different areans but I think God can cover all of them with His one sacrifice. It is simple isn't it....In all circumstances - He is the answer. How we handle anything/anyone...the answer - Him. I think it is tragic when people don't pay attention to their experiences enough to learn from them. Yesterday in my small group we were talking about how ALL things are to be used for Christ. Our sins, our mistakes, our messups, our breakups, our joys, our trials....all things. Sometimes I think my own pride gets in the way and enables me from allowing God to take some of these things and use them....it's like I want to hold on to them for some reason until they fade away and then I can put them in a drawer somewhere and forget about them (along with the drawer of missing socks.)I know that we will never be fully matured because if so we would have nothing else to learn and if we had nothing else to learn and no way to be molded the story of the cross is useless. I do pray that in the meantime, though, I truly allow my heart to be molded from my experiences. Sometimes I like to disregard some experiences as if they didnt happen altogether. What a tragedy! One of the most influential seasons of my life occurred about this time last year. I can't fully put into words the numbness that I felt but I am sure I could go back and read and be reminded - and that is okay...I would do it over every single day to have gained the clarity, insight and discernment that I gained. And you know at the time I can fully remember exactly how I felt and I remember praying that God never let me feel that way again. How beautiful though that He could transform my impression of this season into one of gratitude. His plan is so good. He wants more for us than we can dare imagine. I pray for the big picture tonight. I know I wont understand it all so I dont ask for understanding....I just pray that I wake up thankful that God has chosen to give me another day to be molded and to be used - it means that there is more for me to learn, more maturity to come - with each and every day that is given. I hope I never come to a place where I feel that I have fully arrived or fully matured. I am humbled that He continues to mature me or better yet - continues to dwell in me and give me not self-confidence but Christ-confidence.